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  • Kristyn Culliver

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A MUM (Read for a Laugh!)…

Updated: Aug 7, 2020



Wake up

Silence…

YES, they’re both still asleep

Pry your eyes open, haul you’re exhausted body out of bed and get in the shower

Who knows how much time you have before the madness starts?

Shower, skin care (non negotiable), get dressed - ok feeling a little more human

Kids wake - time for breakfast

Hmm, who should I feed first - baby, 5yo or me???

Ok baby is now screaming, she wins

Prep bottle one handed whilst holding the baby and throw a piece of bread in the toaster for 5yo because she is now also out of control hungry…

Five mins of quiet time as everyone eats… BLISS

Baby comes off bottle

Baby spews all over your clean clothes

Sigh… and it’s not even 8am

“OK Sophia, go upstairs, get dressed and brush your teeth”

“Ok mum”

5yo goes upstairs

Continue feeding baby….

10 mins later I (kindly) yell from the lounge where I am still feeding the baby “SOPHIA WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”

“PLAYING WITH MY DOLLS”

“WHAT DID I ASK YOU TO DO WHEN YOU GOT UPSTAIRS?”

“I DUNNO?”

Repeat instructions again and hope 5yo actually does it

And repeat process again, this time telling 5yo her dolls will be put away immediately if she doesn’t follow instructions

5yo comes downstairs dressed - VICTORY!

OK brush her hair, pack her school bag….

“Sophia put your shoes on please hun”

Now I’m starving hungry and it’s time to leave for school

OK, grab travel mug, make coffee to drink on the way and tie me over

Look down at your top and remember you have been spewed on

Run upstairs to change

Hmmm, running out of clean clothes (looking at pile of washing on the ground)….

Find a t-shirt and run back downstairs

“Sophia have you got your shoes on?”

“Oh no, I forgot”

Ahhh, 8.27am, need to get in the car now

"Sophia come on, let’s go”

“I haven’t got my shoes on Mum! I’m choosing a toy to take to school”

“You’re not allowed toys at school hun. Get out of the playroom and put your shoes on”

5yo huffs and puffs her way to the shoes cupboard

Then has a fit because the seams of her socks aren’t sitting perfectly even on the front of her feet (yes she has possible OCD….)

Finally her shoes are on whilst you make jokes and jump up and down for her entertainment so as to avoid further meltdowns, because - can’t deal

Collect bags, coffee, keys

Oh and pick up baby….

Get everyone in to car (10 mins later)

Drive to school

Get baby and 5yo safely out of car

Drop 5yo at classroom

Ahhhh, made it

Anxiety level immediately drops

Get home, settle baby to sleep

Make breakfast (its 10am) and drink a litre of water because you realise you have had next to no hydration today

OK there is probably a couple of hours before the baby wakes again - YES!

Time to start work:

Mindset work Write blog Post on all social media platforms Check in on team Catch up on trainings Reply to messages and emails Plan future content Give love to FB community Miscellaneous tasks

Good list made, now let’s see if any of this actually gets done

Get in to flow of work

30 mins in, baby cries

Hungry again

Feed baby

Attempt to settle baby

Baby doesn’t settle

Pick up baby and sit on couch

Be held captive by baby as she doesn’t want to sleep anywhere but on you

Now I’m starving hungry again - ugh

Put baby down - she sleeps! Woo hoo!

Make lunch, eat lunch

Get back to work

Half the list completed!

Created some awesome content!

Had an adult conversation with a client and solved some problems!

Woo hoo - feeling accomplished!!!!

Grab baby, drive to school pick up

Chat about day at school, check out some work she did. High five her for an awesome job!

Start prepping dinner

Baby cries - hungry again????? Yup

Feed baby, drinks next to nothing.

Just drink the bottle damn it!!!! No luck….

Put baby down

Go back to kitchen

Baby cries again - feed again

Back to making dinner

Legit pick her up and feed her another three more times because - witching hour

Time for baths - run bath for 5yo

“Sophia, get in the bath”

“Muuuuuummmmmmm, I don’t wannnnnnnnuuuuuuuuuuu”

“Sophia, get in the bath”

“Mum, can I have a bath tomorrow?”

“Sophia, baths are a daily thing and are non negotiable. Please get in the bath”

5yo procrastinates for another 10 mins and finally gets in the bath.

Get 5yo out of bath

Bath baby, dress, feed again and resettle

George comes home, helps with the rest of dinner

We all sit down to eat dinner together

Pick up fork with first mouthful of food

Baby cries

Sigh….

Have no idea why she is crying

Hold baby and eat with one hand

Put kids to bed, George and I tag team between bedrooms until they are both finally asleep

Go in to bedrooms and realise your children are beautiful and you are so blessed and feel a little teary and realise they are so cute (a lot cuter when they sleep!)

Moment of gratitude

Go downstairs

Clean the kitchen

Make school lunch for tomorrow

It’s 9pm, really should be asleep by 10.30pm so I get enough sleep before the baby wakes for night feed

Go upstairs, wash face, brush teeth, get in to pyjamas

Ahhh, silence

Now I have an hour to do what I want…..

But what should I do???

End up scrolling FB and watching 50,000 Insta stories

Come up with some witty content to quickly post on social media

Fall asleep half way through posting witty content

Wake up 20 mins later, put down phone, turn out light and pass out in about 30 secs

All to do it again tomorrow

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Kristyn xx

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