Updated: Aug 7, 2020
Let me be really clear - I LOVE MY CHILDREN
Sometimes I totally resent motherhood
And I know I am not just speaking for myself when I say this…
These are some of the “real” conversations that are had in secret between mums that are NEVER posted on Social Media
This is not a negative, woe is me post.
This is definitely NOT a cry for help (I promise I am happy, healthy and for the most part, as a mum to a newborn, 100% fine)
This however is a post about the reality of day to day motherhood and I feel called to share it
Because if I can help even just one mum not feel lost or alone in how she is feeling, it is worth it!
If you have been following me for long enough you will know I am real and raw and will generally be quite honest with content.
I will tell you the truth and share with you my reality as a mother (actually in all areas of life)
The thing is, it can be very lonely as a mum, even with people are around you (weirdly)
It’s crazy how having to take care of the basic survival needs of a very tiny human can seem like a massive task and how it can knock your confidence
There is such a massive high initially when you welcome your new baby in to the world
And is often followed by a massive low when you realise what is involved in taking care of a baby (even the second time around, because you forget!)
And the overwhelming feeling of being responsible for a completely dependant and helpless human life
Some mothers don’t experience this
But for me, I struggle with the whole newborn thing…
It’s just not my jam.
In fact there are times where I have actually resented what it takes
YUP - there, I said it
I think it’s really easy for a mother to become resentful.
Tell me I’m not alone
I resent being so tired I can’t think straight
I resent it when she won’t settle at 2am when the rest of the world is sleeping and all I want to do is put my head on the pillow and pass out
I resent having to sacrifice the things I love to do each day, all the times I have been desperate to write my blog, engage with my epic community on social media and do my soul work
I resent the fact that keeping a small 3.5kg human fed and thriving can be the hardest job in the world and gets very little acknowledgment.
And I resent that as I am writing this right now, said beautiful little human is waking for yet another feed and has interrupted my writing momentum….
Try being a women who is extroverted, thrives in the company of others AND thrives on general order and routine on her life
And then hand her a newborn and put her in an isolated environment of complete chaos with limited sleep…..
Yeah, it’s not always going to be rainbows and unicorns, even when it involves one of the most precious gifts you could ever receive! (do you feel me?)
If I am not feeding my children, I am settling them
If I am not settling them, I am bathing them
If I am not bathing them, I am getting them dressed
And so it goes on and on all day
And the pockets of time left are just enough to keep myself healthy and functioning.
Don’t they say they definition of insanity is doing the something over and over again…?
I rest my case.
When you are in the thick of it, doing the same thing day in day out is tough for anyone and the feelings are real
I say this not for people to be worried about me, because like I said I’m fine
It’s just what it is and I will get through just like any other mother.
This is all NORMAL in motherhood
BUT - it’s something we don’t talk about enough!
And it’s something we shouldn’t have to do alone or be ashamed of.
So, being the solution focussed person I am, it made me realise there can never be enough support for women as they transition in to the role of becoming a mother (even the second or third time around, as they each present new challenges)
And it’s not just raising a newborn
It’s the complete transformation that comes with being a mother, in all areas of your life
The more opportunities there are for women to find communities, groups and resources to help them through the tough times and the transformation in to this next stage, the better
If want to be a part of a group to lift your confidence, regain your power and feel 100% supported, then join my FB Group - The Empowered Mum's Tribe
So if you’re feelin’ me and like keeping it real as a mum …
Join us!!! :)